The 7th – and Last – Secret of a Can Do Life!

Posted on March 11, 2015 by Cathi Coridan

Find and keep a sense of humor.

Why? Because life it hard enough – being a grouch or always serious just makes it harder.

Back when I had just started chemo, I was talking with a friend when, I out of the blue I remembered a movie I loved as a kid, With a Song in My Heart. It is the story of Jane Froman, a singer who toured Europe to entertain the troops during World War II, who was seriously injured in an airplane accident. Painfully and slowly, she rebuilt her life, always keeping a song in her heart. Jane Wyman played her in the movie and I can hear the song in my head as I type.

That was how With a Song in My Heart became my mantra during chemo, reminding me not to take myself or my situation SO seriously. I learned to laugh about the indignities of chemo – from rashes to the runs – and to laugh at myself in the process! That lighter and more playful attitude helped me grow and learn so much more about what is important in life during my chemo and recovery experience.

A sense of humor balances us. And, laughter bathes the brain in endorphins which soothe and heal the stressed out places. I believe that laughter allows the gratitude in your life to take root in your heart.

One of the most important places to be able to laugh is at work, with the caveat of being respectful, and being careful not to be inappropriate. I have worked in several very high risk, high intensity programs where how a crisis was handled could mean life or death, or at least risk of serious injury. But, even in those environments, maybe especially in those environments, I have appreciated the ability of my colleagues and employees to balance the stress with some lighter moments. I have discovered that sharing a laugh with colleagues helps create bonds that create a carry-over of positive vibes that can be quite helpful during stressful meetings.

Once, long before my Can Do days, during a very intensive program proposal writing process, a colleague who was a partner in the project called and said he had something important to tell me. I took my eyes off the narrative to pick up the phone, thinking “this better add another $10K to the project’s bottom line, or I will scream!” After I said hello, he said, “if at first you don’t succeed,” then paused. I, somewhat tersely, responded, “yes, what?” to which he answered, “don’t try sky diving!” It was just what I needed. And more than 10 years later, I still remember it!

Finding and keeping a sense of humor – so full of wisdom that adds years to our lives and life to our years. And in today’s era of technology, being able to laugh is as easy as finding the puppy, kitty or baby videos on YouTube.

Speaking of YouTube (how is that for a finessed transition!?), I have posted two short preview videos for the new Live YOUR Can Do Life online workshop that launches on Friday! Click here for the Intro to YOUR Can Do Life and click here for Making Possibility Decisions… One of the promises I can make about the workshop series is that it will be engaging and, yes, even fun! While registration is open until March 27th, I encourage you to sign up today to get the most from the workshop videos, tele-workshop on March 18^th and the Live YOUR Can Do Life Workbook. Click here to learn more!

Thanks for joining me on the Can Do Blog during these last seven weeks to learn about the Seven Secrets of a Can Do Life! Writing these posts has been great fun and allowed me to understand and live the secrets a little deeper myself.

The fun does not stop here! Be sure to sign up to be on the email list for the Can Do Blog. (From the menu, it is on the right side of the Can Do Blogs page.) I have made a commitment to post a blog or podcast every Wednesday. It’s kind of my anti-hump-day statement.

Next Wednesday, I will be posting the Can Do Dialogue podcast that my colleague and friend Troy Thompson and I are recording about his fascinating, meaningful – and funny, I might add – No Evil Project. We won’t just be monkeying around, either!! Come back and check it out!

In the meantime, stay well and remember that you can change the world by making the commitment every day to have a positive attitude, grounded in gratitude and based in reality.

It’s Time for the 6th Secret of a Can Do Life

Posted on March 4, 2015 by Cathi Coridan

Remember, life comes in cycles. It’s quite simple and quite timely, this 6th secret: Remember, life comes in cycles. Just when we are SO READY for winter to be over and SPRING to get here.

Spring is COMING! There are little signs around us. It’s March. Spring training games started in Florida and Arizona this week. Daylight savings time starts this Sunday. While it is sure to snow a couple more times in many places across the US, it is a bit easier to take because Spring is COMING!

One of life’s great blessings is that our life comes in cycles. Daily. Monthly. Seasonal. Repeated, yet always changing.

How is Life Comes in Cycles a Secret of a Can Do Life? At the core of my Can Do life is a commitment I make every day (sometimes more than once a day!) to live my life with a positive attitude, grounded in gratitude and based in reality. The great thing about life coming in cycles is that no matter how yesterday went for me, I get to start each day new with this commitment.

Life cycles give us two opportunities – one is to start over! Not in the Scarlett O’Hara procrastinating way of “I’ll think about that tomorrow!” But in the ability to recommit with new energy to how we live our life and work toward our goals. The sunrise brings new light and new energy.

As does spring. For spring, we have rituals, like spring cleaning to brighten and light up our environment. For some of us, it is a re-commitment to exercise after the winter hibernation filled with comfort food and loose fitting sweat pants! Some people go away for Spring Break to play in the sun. In the Christian and Jewish faith traditions, we celebrate Easter and Passover, both of which are filled with symbols of new life, freedom, promise and hope.

Life coming in cycles also gives us the opportunity to remember moments, such as anniversaries and birthdays. To remember and to learn important lessons from the past for our future. Then, to recommit. For me, February 14th is much more than Valentine’s Day. It marks my anniversary of remission from Chronic Lymphocytic Leukemia. It reminds me of how precious my health is and how privileged I am to have it restored! I try to keep that in mind every day, but I celebrate my health and my new life in a special way on Valentine’s Day! And I use that day to commit again to working on my goal of keeping myself healthy.

As spring awakens the earth after the long, cold, grey winter months, I invite you to join me in recommitting on a new level to a whole and healthy life – YOUR Can Do Life.

Imagine how much happier, more productive and stronger our families, neighborhoods, workplaces and communities would be if everyone made a commitment starting today to live his or her life with a positive attitude, grounded in gratitude and based in reality.

I hope that this spring, you Imagine, then Discover What You Can Do!

P.S. One way you can do this is to participate in the new Live YOUR Can Do Life online workshop. Registration starts on March 6th and the workshop launches on Friday the 13th. The multi-media program is open online for two weeks. Learn more by clicking here.

Curious About the Third Secret? WOW…That’s Inspired!

Posted on February 11, 2015 by Cathi Coridan

The third secret of a Can Do Life is to be inspired and have a sense of curiosity!

The day-to-day, minute-to-minute, meeting-to-meeting-ness of life leave us surrounded by stress and mired in minutiae. Traffic. Technology. Kids’ sports schedules. Work deadlines. They seem to conspire to suck our brains, hearts and souls dry!

Enter the third secret! Be inspired & have a sense of curiosity. Don’t stay stuck! Take time to look away from, under or behind all of the “stuff” and “ness” of life to get back to the meat of life’s meaning.

Inspired ([in-spahyuh rd]) adjective: meaning aroused, animated, or imbued with the spirit to do something, by or as if by supernatural or divine influence

Be inspired. Do you have a favorite song, poem, piece of art, photo, prayer, essay or book that lights up your heart? How often do you “visit” the things that provide inspiration? I have two songs: the four Jean Valjean’s singing “Bring Him Home“ at the Les Miz 25th Anniversary concert and Peter Paul and Mary singing “Light One Candle” at their Christmas Concert from years ago. These songs fill my heart with hope and love. Both songs’ You Tube videos are bookmarked so I can jump right to them when I need a little inspiration – Light One Candle is just a little under 4 minutes long and a great investment in keeping my light from going out! How and where can you put and keep a little piece of personal inspiration close at hand?

People also inspire me. In the Can Do Chronicles, I wrote about several people in my life who are everyday heroes that inspire me. I talk about Lorna, Steve and Julie, and how their lives and our relationships help keep me focused on what is important. I add to that list on a regular basis. Recently, I find that the people I am interviewing for the case stories about Can Do Workplaces for my new book really inspire me: Michelle, Karen, Frankie and Sandy; Michael and Evelind; and Errol, Jenna and Michael. Their commitment to and respect for the people they serve draws me into their stories and inspires me to share them with the world! Who in your life inspires you?

curious (kyo͝orēəs) adjective: meaning eager to know or learn something.

Have a sense of curiosity! Ever been around a 3 year old who is filled with questions and the energy to explore his or her world with unbridled curiosity? You can almost feel those brain cells lighting up, expanding and connecting, driving that child to search even harder, explore even more!

Where does all that curiosity go? Somehow, as adults, it seems to get replaced with a different kind of drive – an urgency to get someplace and do something and a frustration if it takes more time that we think it should! Life is so much bigger than our little worlds, and there is so much to explore! When was the last time you took the “scenic route” just to find out what was there? Or asked someone why they like their work, home, car or hobby to learn more about their interests?

Michael Gelb is the author of several books on creativity and innovation, my favorite of which is How To Think Like Leonardo da Vinci: Seven Steps to Genius Every Day. In what he calls “the self-help book that Leonardo never wrote,” Michael presents seven principles, the first of which is

Curiosita: an insatiably curious approach to life and an unrelenting quest for continuous learning.

Michael believes that “curiosita – the quest for continuous learning – comes first because the desire to know, to learn, and to grow is the powerhouse of knowledge, wisdom and discovery.” In the How To Think Like Leonardo Workbook, Michael challenges us to make a list of 100 important questions. Most of us get stuck at around 8 or 9 questions. I challenge you to make a list of 10 to 20 questions, and then to go out and explore, satisfy a little bit of your curiosity looking for the answers!

The cool thing about curiosity is that the more things you do to try to satisfy it, the more it grows! Questions beget questions.

If one of the things you are curious about is how to get and keep more “Can Do” in your life, then I suggest subscribing to the blog via email on the main Can Do Blog page. That way, you don’t have to go looking for new posts! They will come to you every Wednesday!

Have a great week until next Wednesday when I reveal the 4th Secret of a Can Do Life!

Announcing the Seven Weeks of The Seven Secrets of a Can Do Life

Posted on January 22, 2015 by Cathi Coridan

The first Seven Secrets of a Can Do Life virtual workshop series wrapped up its two week run last Friday. It was fun and filled with many firsts and special moments for me, including taping the two videos using my laptop webcam and coordinating the new series of podcasts. Taping the videos was definitely outside my comfort zone, and fraught with crazy mishaps like the calendar falling off the wall with a LOUD crash, and the cell phone that I thought was turned off creating very loud feedback BUZZ in my computer speakers about 9 minutes into a REALLY GOOD take! Through it all, I learned not to take it all – or myself – too seriously!

My biggest fear was “what if I gave a workshop and nobody came?” so I was thrilled that dozens of people from around the world signed up, and then showed up and invested the time to make a Can Do difference in and with their lives. The feedback so far has been quite good, and I am still waiting for a few more of the workshop-ees to complete their surveys on Survey Monkey (hint, hint, if you can hear me, you know who you are!). Part of me wishes I could follow it right up with another series and build momentum and keep it going and growing, but I want to let my experiences and their feedback simmer together, and carefully unpack the lessons-learned before making final decisions about the next round of workshops that will start in the spring. And, I am working hard on my new book, The Can Do Workplace, which has grown to be an engrossing project, filled with great wisdom in the case-stories I am currently writing about some awesome people and five extraordinary organizations from around the world.

So, I asked myself, am I just going to stay quiet about these Can Do Secrets until the spring? NO WAY! So, what to do? I thought about it for a while and came up with a great idea!

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Starting next Wednesday and for the following seven Wednesdays, I am going to use this blog to reveal the Seven Secrets of a Can Do Life to the whole wide world, one secret at a time!

Want to hear a secret? Looking for some motivation to keep your New Year’s Resolution alive? Need some inspiration to offset what is on the news and to beat the winter blues?

Check back here next Wednesday and you will find just that!

Until then, I hope you remember to imagine and discover what you Can Do!

Another chapter begins…

Posted on January 11, 2014 by Cathi Coridan

I am finally beginning to feel it. It’s a subtle shift inside. On the outside not much changes for me, but everything is different.

My husband Ned, whose job was eliminated on November 1, begins a new chapter in his work life on Monday. And I, happily, cease being the sole wage earner in the family.

There were some changes – not so much in “what I did,” but “how I did” – that I deliberately made when we knew that Ned was going to be out of work. We learned of his job loss two weeks after I published The Can Do Chronicles, and I was just coming to terms with being an author, and seriously thinking and planning and trying to figure out what I wanted to do with the whole Can Do “thing.”

I quickly put that planning on hold to pay full attention to my grant writing and development consulting work. My Can Do decision was to “pull myself in” and keep an intense focus on my work and on my health. I was afraid of getting sick, very afraid as colleagues, friends and neighbors coughed and blew their noses all through the holidays. Because I am a contractor, I only get paid when I am working. Getting sick was just NOT an option! Neither was allowing the little black cloud of depression to creep back in. So, when I had breaks from my work, I gave myself permission to relax (well, sort of!) and watch HGTV, movies and TED Talks rather than write blogs and begin making the revisions to the book and calling publishers. (I CAN DO those things now – and I will!)

Last night on my plane ride home from Dallas, I reflected for a bit about how different it feels to be in a position to do what I want to do rather than what I need to do, even when they might be the very same thing. The journey of last few months felt like I was driving when I was very tired or when it was raining REALLY hard – actually like driving when I was tired and it was raining hard. Focus is paramount and the amount of effort and attention needed and stress levels increase as each mile passes, with little relief about any progress made. The only question that kept going through my head is the one we all asked incessantly as children, “are we there yet?”

In the coming weeks, I have several major projects due for both of my clients, so my workload will not change. But my approach to it will. While it won’t be like a drive in the country on a bright summer day with the top down, I will be more relaxed at the wheel, able to listen to the music, take in some of the scenery, and think about where I am and where I want to go.

A final note. While this “ride” was a tough one for me, it was tougher on Ned. He was the one who lost his job, the one looking for work and being disappointed when he heard “sorry, not you,” or sometimes heard nothing at all after extensive interviews. His new job as Director of Development at the Father McKenna Center in downtown DC is a phenomenal opportunity that brings him full circle in many ways, combining his strong fundraising skills with his ministry background in service to those most in need. Congratulations, dude!

During the 90 days of job search (him) and job intensive (me), our Can Do held together – and held us together. We took very good care of each other in getting to this new chapter though the miles and miles of rain and fatigue. This journey has shown me once again that Gratitude + Hope are a powerful, strong and enduring combination.

The Can Do Chronicles Continue….stay tuned!

2013 – A Year In Between

Posted on December 31, 2013 by Cathi Coridan

What a year it has been!

It started with great hope and anticipation as I completed my chemo on January 5th. I was totally unprepared for how lousy I felt all of January and February… it was the cumulative effects of six months of chemo, but it flattened my fantasy of chemo’s end and new life’s beginning. You know what they say about assumptions…

All frustration faded in early March when Ned and I went on an awesome, wonderful 10 day cruise in the Caribbean. With earbuds channeling my favorite tunes, I walked around and around the deck soaking the healing light of the sun’s rays into my blood. Josh Groban, Susan Boyle, Peter Paul and Mary, Mozart, Beethoven, Simon and Garfunkel, Billy Joel, Andrea Bocelli, Mary Chapin Carpenter serenaded my blood and my brain back to health. The scenery was breathtaking – the Caribbean’s forty shades of blue easily match Ireland’s forty shades of green. I took hundreds of pictures on St. Kitts, St. Maarten, Antigua and Tortola – not so much in Martinique, with the beautiful name and so-so scenery. I had read an article about the healing powers of swimming in salt water, so we went to two beaches so I could swim and bob about in the clear blue water. We met and made new friends from California and Scotland. It gets the rating of BEST CRUISE EVER!

Reality returned quickly – the furnace died and so did my work computer… followed by a leak in the water line. Net: over $12K in under 90 days. So much for getting ahead! SIGH!

By late April I was feeling great and began to look for full time work. “Writing grants” is great, and I am very good at it. But, now that I was feeling good, I was getting a little bit bored. Working alone from home, while a comfort when I felt lousy, was making me stir-crazy. I spent some time pulling my thoughts about what was most important to me in my work and life, and developed an advocacy focus and business blog, but it was still not ticking all of my boxes. I applied for several senior development and CEO positions; a couple of them had interesting back stories, too! Most were for nonprofits with strong child-focused missions; one was not! Then I realized, I enjoy my contractor/consultant role and am fortunate and grateful create my own business – and it has the potential to grow and change with time. I don’t have to stay at home and be bored – that is a state of mind that is easily changed as I make plans to get out and meet new people and research what I want my business to become. As I write this, the challenges and stresses of the work-a-day fade, and I realize how blessed I am to have good clients, interesting work and a whole world of opportunity ahead of me. I pause to let it sink in – and smile!

Through the summer and fall I wrote and edited, and re-edited!, and then finally published The Can Do Chronicles, my little e-book that narrates the journey of the last four years. The launch on October 4th was a frenzy of making sure the book got loaded correctly and on time onto the amazon.com site, marketing e-mails to friends and colleagues and just about everyone I had ever met, constant updating of the book’s very own Facebook page, and writing for the Can Do Blog, the book’s very own blog! I had an awesome radio interview in the WOO (Worcester, MA) on Sunday the 20th, and pages of ideas for marketing. I started to believe I really was an author!

As a bizarre twist in a parallel universe to the story I tell in the book, on October 21st, Ned called to tell me that his job had been eliminated. Fortunately, this time I am healthy and working full time, so we are not staring over the cliff into the black abyss like we were on June 18, 2010 when he called with similar news. But, it has been a frustrating and challenging way to end the year. My attention immediately shifted from spending 6-10 hours a week marketing the book and developing the Can Do side of my business and life, to totally focusing on managing my stress level, getting my work done and staying healthy. As a contractor, I have no “paid time off,” and, while I am healthy again, I literally cannot afford a cold or the flu. Ned’s attention is fully focused on getting a new job… his qualifications are fabulous, but his age is a challenge in the current job market.

Both of us continue to count our blessings. Can Do remains at our core. We discovered (again!) that Can Do is not always shiny and bright. Sometimes, Can Do is about keeping on keeping on, even when you want to be doing ANYTHING else but what you are doing – for me, writing one more grant proposal instead of taking a day off; for Ned, not working! I have not written as many blogs as I had hoped, nor have I updated the book in preparation for hard copy publication. I.have.not.had.the.energy. But it is okay! Every single day, I have done the best I could with what I have. And, I have kept my smile – well, most of the time!

While frustrated in some minutes (or hours – or days!), we are not discouraged! We thank God we have each other and our friends and family that are so close and caring on this interesting journey of life. Our life is simpler – when the debit card says stop, we do! Our Christmas gifts were modest. Our celebrations now center on spaghetti or chicken at our dining room table or at a friend’s table – not routine dinners out at nice restaurants. And, going to a nice restaurant is a bigger treat and more appreciated! As the t-shirts say: Life is Good!

When I woke up this morning, I knew I was ready to do some of “my writing” again as a way to reflect and renew and prepare for the days ahead. I close 2013 with both a smile and a song in my heart. I am ready for 2014 and its journey of joys and challenges and new vistas.

God Bless Us Everyone!

Can Do Reflections on a Rainy Morning:

Posted on October 10, 2013 by Cathi Coridan

As I sit here this October morning listening to the steady rain, I am reflecting on the comments that people have made to me in the last week after they have read The Can Do Chronicles.

I had lunch with a colleague yesterday who called the book a “page turner” because of all the problems we had before we moved. Others have remarked about how taken they are with the number of serious challenges we faced during these last three years. They speak as if – and sometimes I think as if – those months were a time apart from my current life, and that that time is over.

My CAN DO reflection for today is: The Journey Never Ends. And things do not go back to “normal.” As I used to tell my counseling clients, Normal is a small town in North Central Illinois. I need my CAN DO outlook and approach to life as much today as I did when I started chemo; as much as I did when Ned’s job evaporated.

It is not over.

It is never over. The scenery changes… the seasons change… and companions on the journey can come and go. My CAN DO outlook helps keep me ready for the ups and downs and ins and outs that are inevitable because I have no idea what is going to happen today or next week on my life’s journey. My remission did not come with a guarantee. My Dad’s declining health is of increasing concern to the whole family. My car and our roof are both OLD. Then, there are the larger, systemic threats to my world over which I have absolutely no control, such as the government shut down and the debt ceiling.

On this rainy day, I renew my commitment to keep the smile in my heart. To find, and share, a bite or two of inspirational nourishment through the day. To stay in good spiritual shape and continue to get in good physical shape. To say thank you to God for the blessings that I have.

So, I went looking for a bite of inspiration on the Pope’s Facebook page… it does not get much better than this: “Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened.” Matthew 7:7-8

It’s what I CAN DO to make the journey as life giving as possible on a very rainy fall day.

What CAN you DO?

How can I help?

The Water is Wonderful!

Posted on September 27, 2013 by Cathi Coridan

I am an ambivalent author no more! In fact, I am getting very psyched for the launch of The Can Do Chronicles next Friday, October 4. The journey getting here has been a bit like trying to decide whether to jump into the chilly water after driving for hours to get to the lake… I have jumped in and the water is great! Or, perhaps a more appropriate metaphor is the fishbowl… I am in the fishbowl, in oh-so-many ways. The water is great and I am swimming like a proverbial fish.

As my friends and colleagues are learning that I have written and am publishing the e-book, I am getting calls and questions asking “so, what’s it about?” It is the story of the last three years of my life, and my husband Ned’s life by association. But, more than the ups and downs and ins and outs of his job loss, my hip replacement and chemo and our 400 mile move, it is the story about what changed inside of me during these months and years – and how I went from having a semi-permanent chip on my shoulder to a pretty permanent song in my heart.

It is also a guide to taking the “but” out of “yes, but” for those who want to use it that way. I introduce the three central questions that now guide all of my decision making. The questions seem so deceptively easy to ask, yet the answers are not always easy to hear – a conundrum to be sure! But those tricky little questions work. Yes, they work wonders.

The Can Do Chronicles will be available on amazon.com as an e-book, but the good news is that you don’t actually have to own a Kindle to read the book. You can read it on any computer, smart phone, or tablet using Amazon’s free Kindle software available at: http://amzn.to/175GXrj.

To celebrate the launch, for the first three days the book will cost only $2.99. That’s less than a coffee at Starbucks. After that, the price goes up to $4.99 – less than a good glass of Pinot Gris. For under $5 you can change your life. That’s quite a deal.

Please help me pass the word as the launch gets closer! Follow and share The Can Do Chronicles on Facebook. You will be glad you did.

Thanks and always remember

The CAN DO Blog

A Place to Discover What You Can Do….

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