Being out of step with the old rhythm of my life…

Being out of step with the old rhythm of my life… it’s a difficult situation to describe.  But it is one filled with hope and gratitude!

My life is good, with so many boxes getting the BIGGOOD check mark:

shutterstock_115027768HEALTH – I am in remission from cancer and I am mostly healthy.  I get more exercise and am physically stronger than anytime in my whole adult life. While I have little bits and crumbs of tummy problems and a lingering cough, compared to this time last year and the three years before it, that is NOTHING… NADA… inconsequential to the MAX!

WORK – In grant-speak, my work is full time, rewarding and fully aligned to my mission: writing grant proposals and developing funding strategies for two child serving organizations that make a positive difference in the lives of our most vulnerable children.  My colleagues are wonderful people whom I am fortunate to learn from every day!

SPOUSE – Ned is working again – and, at an agency he has known, loved and respected since its inception.  The best possible outcome, and one that will last for a long time!

BOOK Yesterday morning I made SIGNIFICANT progress on defining the future of The Can Do Chronicles and some awesome related projects and activities.  Stay tuned… it’s really quite exciting!

Yet, on some levels, the emerging rhythm of my life does not feel right to me. There are days that I am not totally comfortable in my own skin. I am pretty sure that this feeling is caused by the stop-start, uneven life I have lived for the last four years, a timeline that was broken up into three to four month segments, separated by one pretty major life disruption or another, including quitting my “day job” and starting my grant writing business, Ned’s job situations, a major move, my hip replacement and chemotherapy.

images (6)What I realize that I CAN DO now is take the time today and in the days and weeks to come to fully understand what I learned during those stressful months; and, consistently add those lessons learned to the goals I have for the future. When I do – WOW a new symphony begins to emerge! Not quite Mozart… but not bad either.  It is a rhythm different from before – better, stronger and filled with new life.

Several times during chemo, I wrote in this blog about one of my favorite movies from my childhood: With a Song in My Heart. I have a song in my heart – I need to listen to it carefully and share it more often.

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